'Find Your Place'

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I finally broke through the funk. I have a cold, sore throat, runny nose and sneezing. Thank goodness. Nothing like a really horrible day to drop you to your knees and create the opportunity for germ warfare. But at least it's a cold. That is temporary. The roller coaster ride is temporary too, but moves at breakneck speed, not prolonged over days, in my experience. I was getting wigged out when there wasn't any UP.

I have work to do. In the process I came across Richard's photo, and quote. He gave it to me on Valentines Day. Rich believed in me more than I did in myself. He was the Believer, always. Finding this art today helped me do what I needed to do.

I had a realization too. Grief is not only for the lost one, but for me being lost. Everything is different. Everything. 'I am in grief' is a bottomless place. Lots of everything goes into that place. Everything is redefined according to this other reality. The dark place. Maybe like a black hole in a way. It felt that way this week.

Rich gave me a hand UP with his gift, again. You also give me a hand, sometimes a push, lots of hugs, and the word that downtime is ok too. Loosing perspective is not unique to the death of a loved one. Being anxious and afraid it will never be different, is not unique to the death of a loved one either.

'Let your dreams come to LIFE here!'

'Never ever back down...'