Good Friends

...don't make up for what is not there, chocolate either, both are good, just not the answer to empty... eating a healthy meal without nourishment. No why to it. 

Even in hard times I wasn't this alone. Even bad days could end in an embrace. Kids and grandkids don't fill the space. Keeping busy, not doing anything. It is what it is. 

Beautiful scenery, travel, are nice bookends to the inevitable return to the new normal. Sometimes the body needs more. When ready. 

My mom would say, getting older and burying contemporaries is to be expected, but she missed the commonality of experience. I thought, I better keep friends of different ages. Who knew?

No one can fill the missing place. Too many touch points. Not enough touch. As it is. 

Carrying of memory becomes lighter as well. There is no heft left. No push back. No answer to my call. The soul must be real on this level. Where it is.