Holy moly

that was a ton of stuff

A person can be fully dead and alive at the same time in my experience. I don't like it. Oh well. That's life. There is no other way. I'm not bitter. I am grateful for Rich everyday and could not do what I am doing today without the foundation he laid, we laid, to step up from. It is no less weird. 

Maybe those people that grieve leave a room fully furnished for their loved one, not because the hope of return, but the sheer strength and willpower it takes to change what you do not want to give up.

I have been having vivid dreams at night and during the day an occasional smell that makes me look up from what I am doing. Richard. Maybe he is dreaming too. 

The experience of 'moving on' is healthy and totally sucks. Yes dear, I know you are there, it is too bad, I'm moving on. It's good for me. Just take a poker and jam it in my eye. What a deal. 

I unloaded a ton of stuff today. Made sure the donation people got it before the scavengers could get drift of the pile. I wanted it to go to a worthy cause of MY choosing. The shed and studio are getting lighter. My home is transforming.

We could never toss out stuff together. It NEVER happened. Not for the lack of trying. I did dump stuff, alone. I tried without too much shock and awe. The irony of death is that it is sometimes not to unlike life.

I don't like shopping but I do like clearing out the clutter. There goes the 1988 full set of encyclopedia Britannica! I wasn't kidding when I say TON!

I don't like it, not one little bit. I tried not to look.

No garage sale for me